Lorelai Gilmore and Luke Danes were 100% the endgame couple of Gilmore Girls for most fans. While Luke and Lorelai are largely considered the show’s best couple, another couple from the series left fans feeling mostly positive about their union. Richard and Emily Gilmore had an epic love story. While the duo was great together in many ways, three aspects of their relationship seemed a bit toxic. Dare we say, Richard and Emily’s relationship sometimes gave us “the ick.”
Richard kept a massive secret from Emily and acted like it was no big deal
Richard’s most toxic trait was one he hid for more than 30 years. In the season 4 episode, “Ted Koppel’s Big Night Out,” Richard and Emily run into his ex-fiancee at an annual football game at Yale. During the conversation, it is revealed that Richard met up with his former fiancee, Pennilyn Lott, once a year for lunch. The covert meetings are something Emily hadn’t a clue about for over 30 years.
Ed Herrmann | Chris Polk/FilmMagic
Richard insisted that the meetings weren’t a big deal and that nothing nefarious happened during them. That has never sat well with Gilmore Girls fans. Why did Richard need to keep it secret if nothing troubling happened during the lunches? Was it because he knew Emily would be bothered by it or did he simply not consider his wife’s feelings when making plans with other women? The lunch dates and several other factors led to the pause in Richard and Emily’s relationship. They later reconciled.
Richard and Emily could be seriously passive-aggressive with each other
Richard and Emily Gilmore might have spent decades together, but the duo wasn’t exactly the best communicators. Both Richard and Emily could be incredibly passive-aggressive, especially when they felt their partner was not meeting their needs. During the show’s seven-season run, Richard and Emily had very few big arguments, but they had plenty of moments when it was clear they were taking little digs at each other.
Richard and Emily Gilmore | Netflix/Gilmore Girls
When angry about his job, Richard took much of his frustration out on Emily, declining events on her behalf when he didn’t want to attend. When mad at Richard, Emily often honed in on small details and refused to let them go. In seasons 4 and 5, Emily is enraged by Richard’s mustache. Her digs about his facial hair masked her true feelings about how he failed to consider her in his business decisions.
Richard and Emily’s relationship was tarnished by Trix Gilmore’s poor treatment of Emily
Richard and Emily’s relationship seems to have started with some drama. The Gilmore patriarch ended an engagement to date Emily. His mother, Trix Gilmore, wasn’t a huge fan of the entire spectacle. After her death, Gilmore Girls fans learned that Trix begged Richard to call off the wedding the night before the ceremony.
Trix Gilmore | Netflix/Gilmore Girls
While the unearthed telegram was deeply troubling, the problems between Trix and Emily were obvious every time she appeared in Hartford, Connecticut. Trix was mean, demeaning, and demanding of Emily. She took jabs at her and was, overall, a terrible houseguest. Despite that, Richard completely ignored his mother’s poor treatment of Emily, often glossing over even the meanest slights. The only time Richard corrected Trix was when she made a snide comment about lending him money. Overall, Richard’s reluctance to stand up for his wife was one of his most toxic traits. It totally gave us the ick when we think about it.
RELATED: 5 Richard Gilmore Quotes That Prove He Could Be Just as Bold as Paris Geller